News that the USA has been spying on the European Union has caused widespread concern. Not here: this blog believes the USA has every right to spy on its enemies, and there is no doubt which category the EU is in. It's just that it isn't worth the effort.
Fortunately we have been able to obtain a transcript of some of the intercepted proceedings:
A secret room in Brussels
Jean-Pierre Dampierre (FR): under rien circonstances can the detested Anglo-Sassons be allowed to destroy the European social model
Humphrey Eurobloke (UK): we're Anglo Saxons
Dampierre: France is in solidarity with its European brothers but you have only yourselves to blame
Ent van der Plonke (Netherlands): isn't the social model making our people poorer? Isn't it true we can't afford it?
Gianbattista Bastardo (Italy): Il social cohesion, bravissimo!
Splot Splot (Romania): can we have just a little guarantee for our banking system?
Split Split (Slovenia): and perhaps some more social funds
Heinrich Turdfelde (Ruler): Nein nein! We believe in compromise here in Europe. We will keep the social model and you will all starve!
Fighting breaks out, and the Commission issues an Emergency statement promising to surpass North Korea in economic efficiency by 2025.
Really, the Americans needn't have bothered.